Tuesday - December 2, 2008 -

TODAY IS

And on our birthday scoreboard today, Nelly Furtado 32, Britney Spears 27 and that was in double overtime.

Sarah Silverman celebrates birthday number 38 today, presumably without Matt Damon.

Former Secretary of State Alexander Haig turns 84. Ironically, he's no longer in control.


THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW

· Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown were seen together in Atlanta having dinner last week, but a spokesman says that does not mean they are getting back together.

· "How I Met Your Mother" star Cobie Smulders (Robin) and actor Taran Killam are expecting their first child together.

· Rachael Ray has scheduled surgery for December 16th have a "benign cyst" removed from her vocal cords.

· If 18-year-old "Twilight" star Kristin Stewart wants to keep her clean-cut image, We'd recommend avoiding having her picture taken smoking pot in public. There's a photo making the rounds on the Internet.

· TV Chef Gordon Ramsay may prefer the heat of the kitchen, after a mistress has come forward to say that she's one of only three and that he is in a very unhappy marriage.

· What a difference a couple of months makes: There are now only three states and the District of Columbia with regular unleaded gas prices at over $2 a gallon.

· Actor Billy Zane's parents have been accused of ripping off students after they closed down a medical college without warning and then kept $30,000 in tuition fees.

· We don't know how 'together' Madonna and Alex Rodriguez... but they were both in Mexico City over the weekend.

· A television station in Cincinnati -- WBQC -- has officially changed its call letters to WKRP.

· This year's Indiana Wizard of Oz Festival was the last. Organizers say that the numbers were way down and only three of the surviving Munchkins were able to attend. In its hey day, the festival drew upwards of 75,000 people.

· The Rev. George M. Docherty has died at age 97. He was one of the driving forces behind getting congress to put the phrase "under God" into the pledge of allegiance.

· A judge in Colorado has adopted a new form of punishment for people who go to court for being too noisy. Those found guilty choose: an hour of listening to Barry Manilow or the theme tune from the children's TV show Barney and Friends.

· This year is the 25th anniversary of the movie, "A Christmas Story."

· Amy Winehouse is meeting with attorneys to discuss the idea of a divorce.

· The rumor mill has Mary-Kate Olsen pregnant.

· In the "go figure" category, Jude Law and his ex, Sadie Frost, were seen out house-hunting together.

· The Australian media says that Orlando Bloom and model Miranda Kerr are engaged, but they deny it.

· Rosie O'Donnell's live variety show was a flop, attracting only 5 million viewers. So did an episode of the cancelled series, "Pushing Daisies."


There are more than 30 professions that get tips on a regular basis, but how much should you tip for the holidays? (here are the suggestions from the Emily Post Institute):

· Au pair or live-in nanny, one week's pay and a gift from your child.
· Regular babysitter, one evening's pay and a small gift from your child.
· Day care provider, a gift from you or $25-$70 for each staff member and a small gift from your child(ren).
· Live-in help (nanny, cook, butler, housekeeper), one week to one month of pay as a cash tip, plus a gift from you.
· Private nurse, a thoughtful gift from you.
· Housekeeper/cleaner, up to the amount of one week's pay and/or a small gift.
· Nursing home employees, a gift that could be shared by the staff (flowers or food items).
· Barber, cost of one haircut or a gift.
· Beauty salon staff, give individual cards or a small gift each for those who work on you.
· Personal trainer, up to the cost of one session or a gift.
· Massage therapist, up to the cost of one session or a gift.
· Pet groomer, up to the cost of one session or a gift.
· Dog walker, up to one week's pay or a gift.
· Personal caregiver, between one week's to one month's salary or a gift.
· Pool cleaner, the cost of one cleaning to be split among the crew.
· Garage attendants, $10-$30 or a small gift
· Newspaper delivery person, $10-30 or a small gift
· Mail carrier, small gift only
· Superintendent, $20-80 or a gift
· Doorman, $15-$80. $15 or more each for multiple doormen, or a gift.
· Elevator operator, $15-$40 each
· Handyman, $15 to $40
· Yard/Garden worker, $20-$50 each or a gift
· Teachers, a gift (not cash)


WEIRD NEWS

And the Crowd Goes Wild! - It was a big night Saturday night at the Minneapolis Metrodome. We're not talking about Iowa's crushing 55-0 victory over the Minnesota Golden Gophers. We're talking about the show that really brought the crowd to their feet -- the show in the men's room! 38-year-old Lois Kay Feldman was apparently having sex with 26-year-old Ross Matthew Walsh in full view of witnesses. One witness ran to get police after seeing the couple in the handicapped stall while others cheered on. The official police report says Walsh and Feldman were "drunk" and "uncooperative." Ms. Feldman says she doesn't remember any of it. She hired an attorney and told reporters she had been drinking heavily before the game. She added, "Apparently I went to go to the bathroom and I don't know if I ended up in the men's bathroom, and was going to the bathroom. I do not remember anything from the game. I don't remember a thing. I don't remember anything for three hours after. I actually fled the scene and got lost in Minneapolis." Police say Feldman initially gave them a false name before they spoke with her husband to learn her correct identity. He was at the game by the way. Walsh and Feldman had never met before the men's room thing. (Daily Times Herald)

The Subway Ate My Homework - Commuters in New York can now get notes from the New York City Subway system when delays cause them to be late for work. That way they can prove they're not lying about subway delays. (Because you know "The Man" won't ever believe you.) Passengers simply request the delay verification letters over the phone and NYC Transit verifies the date and time of the delay and sends an official note in the mail in one or two weeks. And they're looking to upgrade this technology so it can accept Internet requests and e-mail the excuse letters (myway.com)

Chocolate Jesus Called Tasteless - A host of German churches are quite upset and have criticized businessman Frank Oynhausen for his "Sweet Lord" candy company that has sold thousands of Chocolate Jesus candies. Frank says he only wanted to restore some traditional religious values to Christmas in Germany. But the German Protestant Church criticized the idea as "tasteless" and the Roman Catholic Church was not amused either. Aegidius Engel, a Catholic Church spokesman said, "It is terrible that Jesus is being wrapped up in gold foil and sold along with chocolate bunnies, edible penguins and lollipops. This is ruining the symbol of Jesus himself." But Frank is not deterred and says while he is currently custom-producing the chocolate Jesus figures himself, by Easter he hopes to have a partnership with a mass producer who can export them to the world. He thinks they will be especially popular in parts of the U.S. And he's probably right. (myway.com)

Anybody Up For Baby Mussolini - An extremist political party in Italy is actually offering the equivalent of about $2,000 U.S. dollars to parents willing to name their babies after wartime fascist dictator Benito Mussolini or his wife Rachele, saying their names are under threat of extinction. The MSI-Fiamma Tricolore party, a descendant of Mussolini's fascist party, said the initiative in the poor, southern regions of Italy, was meant keep the Mussolini name alive and pay tribute to the movement's roots. The cash bonus-- intended to pay for baby clothes and food-- applies to babies born in 2009 in five villages where the birth rate is especially low. If you've forgotten your history, Mussolini ruled Italy from 1922 to 1943 when he was ousted after leading Italy to ruin by entering World War Two as an ally of Germany. He was executed along with his mistress Claretta Petacci in 1945. His widow Rachele died in 1979. (myway.com)

Where In the World Is Your Underwear? - In Brazil, designer Lucia Lorio has introduced a line of women's lingerie which comes equipped with a global positioning device so that the wearer can be tracked by satellite. Lorio says the password-protected undies would make it easier for women kidnapped by thugs or terrorists to be located and rescued. But critics say the garment is a virtual chastity belt making it easy for insecure males to keep tabs on where their women are. However, it should be noted that the wearer can manually turn off the device at will. (The Independent)

California's Problems Worsen - Poor Arnold Schwarzenegger. The California governor just can't seem to get a break. Earlier this year, while facing a state budget crisis, Schwarzenegger fired about 10,000 temporary and part-time workers and ordered the 200,000 permanent employees to be paid only the minimum wage of $6.55 an hour until the legislature passed a crisis-solving budget. Unfortunately this plan kind of backfired a week later when State Controller John Chiang pointed out that state payroll records could not be changed to accommodate the cut because they were written in the antiquated COBOL computer language. It seems the only state employees who knew the code were some of the part-timers Schwarzenegger had just fired. (Sacramento Bee)

Oh The Irony! - Universal health care is not looking so enticing in Oregon. Two of that state's health care initiatives recently clashed for resident Barbara Wagner when she was informed that the universal medical care available to everyone in the state (but with certain service restrictions) would not pay for her expensive lung cancer drug because her five-year survival likelihood was not very good. Ironically the state ended up paying for the drugs anyway because they were covered under the new Oregon Death With Dignity Law. Sorry Barbara -- we won't help you live. But we will help you die with dignity! (ABC News)


TOP FIVE REASONS THE ELVES ARE IN A BAD MOOD

1. Santa blasting the song "Short People" over the PA system again
2. Herbie the Dentist out of Novocain again
3. Only clothing store within 40 miles of the North Pole is a Big & Tall shop
4. Too short to ride any of the rides at Disneyland
5. The company basketball team has lost their 395th straight game


HUNTER'S HUMOR by Tim Hunter
The Christmas Tree for the Blue Room of the White House has arrived. It's from North Carolina and a Fraser Fir, although President Bush says it doesn't look a thing like Kelsey Grammar.

The Dalai Lama says that sex only complicates life and that chastity offers a better life and more freedom. Good for him. I'll take the risk.

It's that time of year when we, as a people, collectively share the same sentiment. So, if I may, I'd just like to say what you're thinking: I'm sick of leftover turkey!

Great! Now we've got leftover turkey! We just finished up the last of our Easter ham!
May your holiday spirit long outlast your Thanksgiving leftovers.


Now on to the good stuff – ROCK NEWS –


GUNS N' ROSES SALES NOT LIKELY TO BE SPECTACULAR …The new Guns N' Roses album, Chinese Democracy, could end up selling less than 300,000 copies in its first week on shelves. According to Billboard.com, the long-delayed CD will finish with a total of somewhere between 250,000 and 260,000 copies since going on sale exclusively through Best Buy on Sunday, November 23rd. That is a far cry from initial predictions of anywhere from 300,000 to 784,000 copies and won't be enough to beat rapper Kanye West, whose new 808s and Heartbreak is likely to finish the same period north of 400,000 copies.

Final sales figures will be released on Wednesday (December 3rd).

According to some reports, Best Buy's promotion of the CD was lacking. Many stores did not feature any special floor displays or banners for the record, and it was not highlighted in advertising circulars.

If Billboard's predictions for Chinese Democracy hold true, the album will sell around the same in its first week as Contraband, the 2004 debut disc from Velvet Revolver that features members of the original Guns lineup.

Only singer Axl Rose remains in the current Guns roster, having taken some 15 years to complete Chinese Democracy with a revolving cast of musicians.

Chinese Democracy did debut at Number One in Finland and Brazil, while reaching Number Two in the U.K. and New Zealand and finishing in third place or lower in Australia, Ireland, Italy, Japan, Spain and other countries.


RUSH NOT WORKING AGAIN UNTIL LATE 2009 …Rush guitarist Alex Lifeson told the Toledo Blade that the Canadian trio probably won't regroup to start working on a new studio album until sometime late next year. Lifeson said about the band's future plans, "Right now we just want rest. We've been working really hard for the last seven or eight years on numerous records, tours, and DVDs; it's been pretty constant through that whole period. We really feel like we need to step back and recharge our batteries and just not think about the band and what we're going to do. You never know, Geddy (Lee, bass/vocals) and I might do some casual writing in the spring, but I'm guessing we probably won't do anything until the fall of next year. At that time...we'll set out what we're doing."

Rush's latest studio effort, Snakes & Arrows, came out in 2007. A concert DVD called Snakes & Arrows Live arrived in stores last week.

As for their next studio album, Lifeson hinted that it could be a concept record, possibly in the vein of the group's 1976 classic, 2112. Lifeson said that Snakes & Arrows producer Nick Raskulinecz "is pushing us to think about doing another sort of concept record...instead of just a thematically conceptual album like the most current records are. Whether we're up for that kind of thing, I'm not so sure. We'll have to wait and see."


'LIVE EARTH INDIA' CANCELED …Due to the terrorist attacks in Mumbai which took the lives of nearly 200 people, Live Earth India -- which was to have featured headliners Roger Waters and Jon Bon Jovi performing live in the city on Sunday (December 7th) -- has been canceled. Billboard reported that Bon Jovi, Waters and Bollywood actor Amitabh Bachchan issued a joint statement saying "Due to circumstances beyond our control, we are saddened to announce that Live Earth India has been called off."

Viraf Sarkari, director of the Wizcraft event management firm said, "We are all shaken up by this event, and even though we believe in the cause of global warming, we have indefinitely postponed the Live Earth concert."

There has been no rescheduling date set for the benefit concert.

Live Earth's mission is to leverage the power of music and entertainment to focus the world's attention on the most pressing environmental issues of our time and then actively effect change.


NIKKI SIXX HOLDING COVENANT HOUSE BENEFIT ON TUESDAY …Motley Crue bassist Nikki Sixx and his girlfriend, tattoo artist and reality TV star Kat Von D., are holding a benefit event for Covenant House on Tuesday night (December 2nd) at the Carmichael Gallery in West Hollywood, California. According to Blabbermouth.net, the event will showcase 66 sketches of Sixx done by Von D. The original prints will be up for sale, with all the proceeds going to Running Wild In The Night, a music program Sixx co-founded with Covenant House. Sixx said in a statement about the event, "Not only am I honored to have my girlfriend support this program, but to have a great artist draw 66 portraits of me pretty much blows my mind...I hope you come out and give the kids at Covenant House an early X-mas gift of support."

The gallery is right next to High Voltage Tattoo, where Von D. films her TLC reality series L.A. Ink.

More info can be found at carmichaelgallery.com.

Sixx was honored at a Covenant House gala last May for donating proceeds from his memoir, The Heroin Diaries, to the Running Wild In The Night program. The bassist and recovered drug addict told us about the event: "Covenant House, which is a great organization that helps at-risk youth, they had, you know, honored me with, you know, an award for helping bring awareness and money. It was a great opportunity, you know, for me, and I'm not so much into awards and stuff, but it was an opportunity for me to give them a check for a quarter million dollars."

Covenant House California has taken in more than 150,000 homeless youth since 1988. The non-profit organization says its mission is to "protect and safeguard all children of the street" through comprehensive services of street outreach, residential programs and supportive services.


PAUL McCARTNEY DEFENDS RINGO STARR'S BAN ON AUTOGRAPHS…Paul McCartney defended former bandmate Ringo Starr, who recently posted a message on his website (ringostarr.com) saying that he would no longer sign items from fans mailed to him. The message, which showed a slightly unnerved Ringo putting his foot down about signing items, put more than a few fans off. Ringo's representatives explained that the angry video message was due to the fact that numerous fans were selling the autographed items on eBay.

Gigwise.com reports that McCartney said, "Ringo's always been like that, God bless him. We love Ringo because he just says what he thinks. If he doesn't want to sign anything anymore then he doesn't have to. I don't mind that, I think it's really good; it's his life after all. And yeah, he gets in trouble occasionally, but as anyone who has known Ringo as long as I have knows that's what he's like. I think it's a good quality; it's called honesty actually."

McCartney explained why for his new album Electric Arguments, which is his third collaboration with producer Youth, he decided to incorporate vocals into the usually ambient-tinged projects: "Having made two albums (without vocals) we decided it was time to change. Youth suggested to me, 'How about we do vocals?' I said: 'Well, I haven't got any songs, I've no idea.' So he said, 'Well, you want to try a bit?' -- Because it's the Fireman and anything goes. I said: 'Yes sure... We just kept singing these things at the track and mostly a song came out of it. So that's how the Fireman found his voice."


RON WOOD SAYS FACES REUNION REHEARSALS WERE 'FANTASTIC' …Ron Wood confirmed the Faces upcoming reunion and says that new music from the band might also be in the pipeline. Wood spoke about the band's recent rehearsals featuring himself, Rod Stewart, Ian MacLagen, and Kenney Jones -- with Stewart's touring bassist Conrad Korsch sitting in, telling Rolling Stone, "We had a few fantastic rehearsals last week and we're ready to go. It's like no time has passed by... There's a lot of guest bass players that want to do (the tour) -- including Flea."

Although the band's itinerary is still up in the air, the tour is set to take place in 2009: "We just have to sort out when and where and drop all of the management egos and just do what we can. We know we can do it. It's just a matter of getting everyone's availability sometime next year."

Wood said that new material might also be incorporated into the shows, saying, "Rod wants me to write a load of new stuff for him, so I can do that."

He was asked about any future plans with the Rolling Stones, who apart from promoting their recent concert documentary Shine A Light, have been pretty quiet this year: "I'm always itching to do more work with (the Stones). We just haven't decided when and where, yet, but I know we will."

Rod Stewart's next U.S dates are set for January 29th and 30th in Hollywood, Florida at the Seminole Hard Rock Live.


CHILI PEPPERS' FLEA TO PLAY WITH THE FACES? ….Red Hot Chili Peppers bassist Flea could pick up some work during the band's current hiatus as touring bass player for legendary 60s rock band the Faces, who are planning a reunion tour for 2009. Faces guitarist Ron Wood, better known these days as a Rolling Stone, told RollingStone.com, "We had a few fantastic rehearsals last week and we're ready to go. It's like no time has passed by...There's a lot of guest bass players that want to do (the tour) -- including Flea." Original Faces bassist Ronnie Lane died in 1997 from pneumonia after years of declining health.

The Faces also feature singer Rod Stewart, keyboardist Ian MacLagen, and drummer Kenney Jones.

An official confirmation and itinerary for the Faces tour has yet to be announced.

The Chili Peppers have been on an extended break since completing the touring cycle for their 2006 double album, Stadium Arcadium. Singer Anthony Kiedis is developing an HBO series based on his memoir Scar Tissue, while guitarist John Frusciante is issuing a new solo album in January and drummer Chad Smith is playing in a new group with Sammy Hagar.


That’s it for now, as always, if you can’t be good, be good at it and don’t get caught!!

Jonathan