Wednesday - December 3, 2008 -

ON THIS DAY

On this date in 1621, Galileo invented the telescope. It was also the same day that all of Galileo's neighbors went out and got curtains.

In 1828, Andrew Jackson was elected President of the United States. He said, "My only hope is that I can be a good enough president that, some day, you'll put me on the $20 bill" and the rest, as they say, is history.


TODAY IS

Only 22 shopping days left.

Brian Bonsall, that cute little kid from "Family Ties," turns 27 today. 27? Oh, my... it's 2008! TV Land had us convinced it was 1984.

Brendan Fraser turns 40 today. You gotta admire a guy who's 40 and still close to his mummy.

Figure skater Katarina Witt hits 43 today. "Years old," I'm pretty sure, not "proof."

Paul Nicholas, who starred in "Heaven on the 7th Floor," turns 63 today. These days, he's taking the elevator.


THIS WEEK IS

National Hand Washing Awareness Week -- December 1-7. A phoner that worked for us was talking about washing hands. Studies say that frequent hand washing greatly reduces your chances of getting sick as often. Doctors recommend washing your hands before meals with warm soap and water for about as long as it takes to sing "Happy Birthday." Calls ranged from disgusting stories to those at the other end of the spectrum who are super-anal about germs. You won't believe some of the rituals some people go through.


(Family Circle) Public bathrooms are cleaned fairly often, so while you're wise to use your hip to push open stall doors and paper towels to manage handles and knobs, you're more likely to pick up the sniffles from other places in your daily travels. Pull out your handy antibacterial wipes when you're:

· At the grocery store. How often do you think shopping cart handles are cleaned? Think how often they're used.

· Using cashier pens. Pens provided to sign credit card purchases are superb carriers of cold viruses. That goes for pens in doctors' offices, at banks, and by delivery people. So carry your own pen.

· At ATM and in the elevator. Press all buttons with a finger or knuckle that you're unlikely to use to touch your eyes, nose or mouth. Better yet, use a key or a pen you carry with you.

· Washing your hands. Unless the liquid hand soap in public bathroom is in its own sealed bag, it's likely a breeding fiesta for bacteria. Rinse well with warm water and use your own hand sanitizer.


Pushing an elevator button is more likely to make you sick than kissing your under the weather husband. Why? If someone sneezes into his hand before hitting the button, the virus ridden fluid from his nose awaits you. Saliva, however, contains little, if any, cold viruses, explains Dr. Neil Schachter, M.D., professor of pulmonary medicine at Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York City and author of "The Good Doctor's Guild to Colds and Flu."

Woman's Day offers these stats on colds and flu.

· 200 plus cold viruses exist
· 3 to 8 colds is the average number a child will get in a year
· 93mph is the rate at which air particles travel out of your nose and mouth when you sneeze
· 3 feet is the distance droplets can travel from a cough or sneeze
· 5 minutes is the time germs can live on hands
· 1 to 2 days is how long cold germs can live on hard surfaces like doorknobs pens, and phones
· 8 to 12 hours is how long a cold virus remains on cloth, tissue and paper
· 30 seconds is how long you should scrub your hands to kill germs


THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW

· President-Elect Barack Obama is giving his wife a $30,000 ring to show his appreciation for her support during his presidential campaign, a ring she'll have on her hand by inauguration day. The Harmony ring is made of rhodium - the world's most expensive metal -- and encrusted with diamonds.

· Lance Armstrong says he'll be back racing at the Tour de France next year.

· A juror was AWOL for the murder trial of a former "Sopranos" actor on Monday. He was arrested during the weekend after allegedly punching his 15-year-old stepson in the face.

· Yes, economic times are tough. But video game sales this Christmas are still expected to exceed a 15% increase over last year.

· Mariah Carey's husband has given her an early Christmas present: a $1.5 million ski chalet in Aspen, Colorado.

· The FDA is about to approve a new sweetener, made naturally from the Stevia shrub out of South America... although China actually grows 80% of the world's Stevia. No chemicals, zero calories.

· Keith Urban is going to tour again next year, hitting the road in May. Supporting acts will include Taylor Swift, Sugarland and Dierks Bentley.

· The number one topic for Yahoo searches this year and seven of the last eight years? Britney Spears.

· CBS has picked up "Eleventh Hour" for five more episodes.

· If Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer ever do get married, he'll bake their wedding cake. He fancies himself quite the baker.

· After nearly 20 years of marriage, "CSI" star Marg Helgenberger has separated from her husband.

· Mario Lopez will again host the Miss America pageant January 24th in Las Vegas.

· Ivana Trump and her fourth husband are calling it quits after just getting married in April.

· That scar on Tina Fey's left cheek is leftover from an incident when she was five years old and a stranger slashed her cheek.

· If you haven't seen Ricki Lake lately, she's dropped 140 pounds. In her words, "Not skinny by Hollywood standards," but she's looking great.

· This year, the cost of the full 12 days of Christmas is $86,609. Of course, that's not including tax and tip.

· Cosmopolitan magazine reports the more a guy's eyes dilate, the better he looks to you.

· 28 North American concert dates for Madonna grossed $91.5 million.

· Courtney Cox is going to guest star when "Scrubs" returns to a new network, ABC, on January 6th. Another "Friend," Matthew Perry, will guest star later in the season.


WEIRD NEWS

Help! My Husband Took Viagra! - In Palermo, Italy, 69-year-old Carla di Stefano called police after her 82-year-old husband, Giovanni, took Viagra! Carla said he was so excited she thought he would have a heart attack. The police didn't really do anything once they arrived but their presence had the desired effect. He lost interest in his love life pretty quickly. Carla later told police, "I was terrified. He's 82 and I thought so much love could have lethal consequences." (Ananova)

It Doesn't Get Much Sicker Than This - This is about as demented as it gets. 33-year-old Christopher S. Johnson, an Ohio State University academic adviser, and 42-year-old real estate agent Rusty Blades have been arrested after they allegedly held a $10-a-ticket raffle that offered an evening with a prostitute! The event, held in Rusty's home, was organized through a Craigslist.com chat board. Both Johnson and Blades were charged with promoting prostitution. But here's the worst part. The alleged prostitute was identified as 31-year-old Vanise Dunn -- who has worked at Franklin County Children's Services since 2000 -- as a child sex abuse case worker! She has been on paid leave since her arrest while the agency is looking into whether she violated any of its policies. What??? You've got to look into that? You don't already know?? You mean to suggest that it just may be possible that it's perfectly okay with Franklin County Children's Services that your child sex abuse case workers can moonlight as whores? What the hell? (myway.com)

The Good Lord Made Me Do It - In San Antonio, Texas, a guy who rammed his truck into a woman's vehicle on Highway 281 while going over 100 mph told police he did it because God told him, "she needed to be taken off the road." The truck rear-ended the car and both vehicles then spun across a median then came to a stop along a barrier in the opposite lanes. Both drivers suffered only minor injuries. Bexar County Sheriff's Office spokesman Kyle Coleman said, "He just said God said she wasn't driving right, and she needed to be taken off the road. But God must have been with them, 'cause any other time, the severity of this crash, it would have been a fatal." Interesting -- there was no trace of alcohol in either driver. The truck driver has been ordered to take a psych evaluation. (myway.com)

Double Drunk Drivers! - Police on Long Island say it's a first -- pulling over two drunk drivers from the same car! Nassau County officers say they spotted a woman trying to make a three-point turn on a city street but clearly couldn't complete the maneuver. So she switched places with a male passenger, who took the steering wheel and completed the turn while not wearing a seat belt. Police eventually pulled them over and discovered both were intoxicated. Both now face drunken driving charges. (Newsday)

Oh Deer! - In Sedalia, Missouri, hunter Randy Goodman bagged a big 9-point buck on the second day of hunting season -- or so he thought. Randy was sure the two well-placed shots with his .270-caliber rifle had killed the buck and the deer definitely looked dead to him. But seconds later the 240-pound animal rose up, knocked Randy down and attacked him with his antlers in what the veteran hunter called "15 seconds of hell." The deer then ran a short distance and went down, and died after Randy fired two more shots. That's when Randy started feeling dizzy and noticed his vest was soaked in blood. He managed to get back to his truck and drive himself to the hospital where he received seven staples in his scalp and was treated for a slight concussion and bruises. Somewhere in a forest in Missouri other deer are high-fiving and making "whoop whoop" noises! (The Sedalia Democrat)

Dealing With Conmen the Chinese Way - Say what you will about China -- but they know how to deal with their conmen! Wang Zhendong was arrested and convicted of being the leader of a bogus scheme for breeding ants to make aphrodisiacs that conned investors out of $439 million dollars. Wang promised investors in the fictitious projected returns of 35 to 60 percent. One investor committed suicide after realizing he had been duped, while many others suffered from depression and financial ruin. But he won't do it again. They just executed Mr. Zhendong. Case closed. (Xinhua News Agency)

They Don't Call It Black Friday For Nothing! - It really was a Black Friday in Palm Desert, California, where we have learned two men actually shot and killed each other at a crowded Toys "R" Us store on the day after Thanksgiving. 39-yeasr-old Alejandro Moreno and 28-year-old Juan Meza were found dead at around 11:30 a.m. outside the store. Two handguns recovered at the scene indicate the two men shot each other. No one else in the packed store was injured during the melee. Witnesses say the men produced guns after women they were with got into an altercation with each other. As the men ran shooting at each other, frantic shoppers dropped their purchases and sought cover. Merry Christmas. (AHN News)


TOP FIVE SIGNS THE HOLIDAY SEASON HAS GOTTEN AWAY FROM YOU

1. Everyone on your list this year is getting gum
2. You're just now sending out last year's Christmas cards
3. Your family draws everybody else's name and someone get your name as a penalty
4. Try as hard as you like, no one buys that's a Christmas pumpkin on the porch
5. After a year's worth of teasing about the Christmas tree still being up, NOW who's the smart one?


HUNTER'S HUMOR by Tim Hunter

While in England to talk with the prime minister, Condoleezza Rice took time out to play the piano for the queen. No, not Elton John... the main queen: Elizabeth the 2nd.

In Texas, a man claims that God told him to smash into another driver at 100 mph. Well, of course, God wouldn't be afraid to drive that way. What's the worst thing that could happen? He could crash and end up back with himself?

Economists have made it official: they confirm that we're in a recession. If you would, please imagine the loudest "duh" you've ever heard before.

Here's Elvis Presley, singing, "I'm Gonna Have a Blu-Ray Christmas Without You."

Barack Obama is giving his wife a $30,000 ring to say thanks for being by his side. Oprah only had three words to say: "What about mine?"


WRITE THAT WILL

Maxim gives us these tips about death and taxes: how to prepare for one while reducing the other:

· Die like a pro -- Even a singing mistake can weaken your Will's validity, and it only takes one greedy nephew to tie it up in court for months and lop off up to eight percent of your estate in legal fees. Skip the Web sites and get a flesh and blood attorney to draft you an airtight document.

· Build Trust -- According to David T. Phillips, author of State Planning Made Easy, leaving everything to your spouse could mean losing 25 percent of a $4 million estate to taxes. Shelter half of that in a Bypass Trust instead: Wifey gets paid, the kiddies get their tax-exempt tax.

· Beyond the grave -- Unless you want your trust fund baby living as an "artist" in a $3 million loft purchased with your retirement, set some rules. Whether it's graduating college, getting married, or turning 30, any milestone can determine when they receive your hard earned dough.

· Live and die -- Real estate is a great investment... till taxes are due. To pay off death taxes imposed on your home or business, jack up your life insurance policy, otherwise you'll lose the assets just to pay the IRS. Just $12,000 in payments can cover an estate tax bill of $1 million.


TOP 10 THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER SAY TO HER

Askmen.com says there are some instances when you are better off either shutting up or telling a little white lie -- or risk spending the night on the couch.

1. Man, you look so much like your mom!
2. I would have invited you, but you're no fun.
3. Anything related to marriage or children.
4. Would have, could have, should have.
5. You don't need another pair of shoes.
6. Any story about your private life.
7. Come on, a few little cramps never hurt anybody.
8. What's the big deal? You have another birthday next year.
9. Are you sure the dress shrunk?
10. That's not the way my ex did it.


Now, on to the good stuff – ROCK NEWS –


OZZY OSBOURNE HITS 60 …It's hard to believe, but rock and roll's prince of darkness Ozzy Osbourne turns 60 on Wednesday (December 3rd). The father of heavy metal and former Black Sabbath frontman never anticipated such longevity, figuring he'd succumb to his rock and roll excesses long before he was eligible for social security: "Let me tell you, when I was 20 I was going, I'd go, 'I'm gonna die by 40.' And that was all right until I was 39 and a half."

Although he's threatened to retire before and is now entering his seventh decade, Osbourne told us not long ago that he has no intention of calling it quits these days: "I don't wanna stop, you know. It's been the biggest love affair of my life. When you reach a certain age in rock 'n' roll, people think, 'Well, this has got to be his last tour,' or 'This has got to be his last tour,' or 'You've got to come next Tuesday 'cause he ain't gonna do it after that.' You'll know when I've come off the road permanently. I mean, you'll know!"

John Michael Osbourne was born in the Aston district of the gritty industrial town of Birmingham, England, one of Jack and Lillian Osbourne's six kids.

John dropped out of school at the age of 15, working as a laborer, plumber, toolmaker and slaughterhouse worker. He also spent a few weeks in prison after being arrested for burglary.

He later formed a band with classmate and guitarist Tony Iommi. The pair decided to play a darker, blues-influenced style of music instead of the psychedelic rock that was all the rage at the time. That group, originally called Earth, became Black Sabbath. Completed by drummer Bill Ward and bassist Geezer Butler, Sabbath became hugely successful with albums like Paranoid, Master of Reality and Sabbath, Bloody Sabbath.

The group arguably created the template for heavy metal and inspired generations of bands over the past 38 years. Sabbath was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2006.

Ozzy left Sabbath in 1979 and embarked on an even more succcessful solo career with albums like Blizzard of Ozz, Diary of a Madman and last year's Black Rain. He reunited with Sabbath in 1997 and the band has toured sporadically since then.

Known for his drug and alcohol abuse for many years, Ozzy was also notorious for such shocking acts as biting the head off a dove, biting the head off a bat, attempting to strangle his wife and manager Sharon and urinating on the Alamo.

He, Sharon and their children Jack and Kelly starred for several seasons in the MTV show The Osbournes, a landmark in the "reality series" genre. Fans, however, did not care for the show's portrayal of Ozzy as a bumbling, out-of-it buffoon.


VELVET REVOLVER HIRES IRISH SINGER? …Velvet Revolver is reportedly looking into hiring Irish singer Phil Conalane, from little-known act Million Dollar Reload, as a replacement for the dismissed Scott Weiland. According to Classic Rock magazine, Conalane was apparently recommended by ex-Guns N' Roses drummer Steven Adler as well as members of Stone Gods, the band formed from the remnants of The Darkness. A source that's supposedly inside Velvet Revolver's management said, "Phil is experienced but relatively unknown on the international stage, which would fit Velvet Revolver's bill of fresh blood as they try to rebuild their career following the disappointing sales of their last album, Libertad, and the G N' R return that has left them reeling."

The source added that Conalane had a reputation as a "good songwriter," and that Velvet Revolver guitarist Slash was seen talking with a representative from Conalane's label at the recent Classic Rock Awards.

Slash told us that finding the right person to front Velvet Revolver has not been easy so far: "It's just a tough gig, because we're looking for something that isn't what you'd consider readily available these days, which is a rock singer with heart, that has a certain amount of intensity that's genuine, that's not fabricated. And this business is the way it is right now, so it's like finding a needle in a haystack."

Velvet Revolver has been hunting for a singer since last April, when the band decided to dismiss Weiland due to his erratic behavior. Although the group has reportedly auditioned several vocalists, the only one confirmed by name was former Spacehog frontman Royston Langdon.


ROCK QUICK HITS…The dates for the 2009 Bonnaroo Music & Arts Festival have been announced, with the eighth annual event taking place from June 11th through the 14th at its regular home, a 700-acre farm 60 miles southeast of Nashville in Manchester, Tennessee. Ticket pre-sales for the festival will begin on December 4th, 2008, and go through December 31st. Previous acts that have played the event include Metallica, Pearl Jam, Jack Johnson, Bob Dylan, Radiohead, Tool, Wilco, the Dave Matthews Band, the White Stripes, Death Cab For Cutie and many others. (Bonnaroo.com)

If you miss Metallica on the current leg of their Death Magnetic world tour, don't worry. Drummer Lars Ulrich figures there will be more opportunities to see the group, saying, "We're booked up through August of next year, and right now we're sort of laying out Fall of '09 and the Spring of '10. We're waiting for a few other countries to be actually formalized as nations so we can be the first band in. We're also waiting for the polar caps to stabilize so we can go play there. There's talk about some other planets too." (Rolling Stone)

Hurt has completed work on their third album, titled Goodbye to the Machine. Look for a single to surface next month and the album to arrive in February or March. (Tunelab Music).

Sevendust will hit the road as openers for Black Label Society on the latter's 2009 tour. The first confirmed dates are:
March 12 - Portland, OR - McMenamins Crystal Ballroom
March 21 - Winnipeg, MB - Burton Cummings Theatre
March 25 - Kansas City, MO - VooDoo Lounge
March 27 - Milwaukee, WI - Eagles Club
March 31 - Mount Clemens, MI - Emerald Theatre
April 1 - Pittsburgh, PA - Club Zoo
April 4 - Toronto, ON - The Sound Academy
April 6 - Hartford, CT - Webster Theater
April 15 - Baltimore, MD - Rams Head Live
May 1 - Las Vegas, NV - House of Blues
More dates and supporting acts will be announced soon. (Tunelab Music)


PAUL McCARTNEY EYEING MORE SINGLE SHOWS RATHER THAN TOUR ..Paul McCartney has ruled out a major world tour -- but says that he may do some select gigs as part of the Fireman. McCartney's latest Fireman collaboration with producer Youth called Electric Arguments is out now and receiving mostly positive reviews. McCartney was asked if he and Youth have any intentions of taking the show on the road. The former Beatle told BBC News, "At the moment we haven't got any plans. But we're kind of anticipating it. Me and Youth have said we'll see how it goes. If suddenly there's a big demand for it, I'd like to try it. It would be quite challenging."

McCartney, who has been rumored to be plotting what may be his final world tour, was asked about his future plans away from the Fireman project: "I'm looking at doing some little gigs here and there -- I've been doing some one-offs this year, which have been interesting to do instead of a big major tour. I'm also writing some other stuff in the background, but there's no big plans. No world tour."

On This Day In Beatles History -- December 3rd:

1938: John Lennon's parents, Alfred Lennon and Julia Stanley marry.

1961: The Beatles, including then-drummer Pete Best, have their first formal meeting with manager Brian Epstein.

1965: The Beatles, supported by the Moody Blues, kick off their final U.K. tour in Glasgow at the Odeon Cinema. It was during the tour that Paul McCartney struck up a close friendship with then Moody's guitarist -- and future Wings cofounder -- Denny Laine.

That same day the Beatles released their sixth album, Rubber Soul, as well as their "We Can Work It Out"/"Day Tripper" single, which marked the band's first "Double A-Side" release.


THE PRETENDERS ANNOUNCE FIRST HEADLINING TOUR IN FIVE YEARS…The Pretenders have announced their first headlining tour in five years, kicking off on January 29th in Albany, New York. The band, which is playing a few select holiday shows this month, will be promoting their latest album, Break Up The Concrete.

Chrissie Hynde says that the new album wasn't spurred on by any great artistic vision that she needed to get out to the band's fans: "Well, I guess I just had a few songs. It just seemed like the time was right. I'm not any kind of a deadline or anything. These things kind of fall into place when the time's right. You can't really plan them -- or I certainly don't. I'd been doing a lot of touring and you can't keep playing the old songs all the time 'cause it's just boring. So it just seemed like the time had come."

The Pretenders tour dates (subject to change):
December 10 - Los Angeles, CA - Club Nokia
December 12 - Portland, OR - Roseland Theater
December 13 - Seattle, WA - Paramount Theatre
January 29 - Albany, NY - Palace Theatre
January 30 - New York, NY - Roseland Ballroom
January 31 - Atlantic City, NJ - Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa/Music Box
February 2 - Washington, DC - 9:30 Club
February 4 - Boston, MA - Orpheum Theatre
February 5 - Jim Thorpe, PA - Penn's Peak
February 6 - Philadelphia, PA - Electric Factory
February 7 - Mashantucket, CT - Fox Theatre
February 9 - Ann Arbor, MI - Michigan Theater
February 10 - Cleveland, OH - House Of Blues
February 11 - Indianapolis, IN - Murat Theatre
February 13 - Cincinnati, OH - Taft Theatre
February 14 - Akron, OH - Akron Civic Center
February 15 - Chicago, IL - Riviera Theatre
February 17, 18 - Milwaukee, WI - Northern Lights Theater
February 20 - Minneapolis, MN - First Avenue
February 21 - Kansas City, MO - Ameristar Hotel & Casino
February 22 - Tulsa, OK - Brady Theater
February 24 - Denver, CO - Paramount Theatre
February 25 - Aspen, CO - Belly Up Aspen
February 27 - Dallas, TX - House Of Blues
February 28 - Houston, TX - House Of Blues
March 1 - Austin, TX - Stubb's Bar-B-Q / Waller Creek Amph.
March 4 - Phoenix, AZ - Dodge Theatre
March 5 - San Diego, CA - House Of Blues
March 6 - Pala, CA - Pala Casino
March 7 - Las Vegas, NV - House Of Blues
March 8 - Anaheim, CA - Grove Of Anaheim
March 10 - Los Angeles, CA - The Wiltern
March 13 - San Francisco, CA - The Fillmore
March 14 - Reno, NV - Silver Legacy Resort Casino

The Pretenders have just issued their first E.P. of Christmas music. The four-track collection features the band's own holiday standard, "2000 Miles," along with yuletide evergreens "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus," "Blue Christmas," and "Blue Christmas Part 2."


That’s it for now, as always, if you can’t be good, be good at it and don’t get caught!!!

Jonathan