Whether we know it or not, each of us lives a life governed by an internalized code of conduct. Some call it morality, others call it religion. I call it “The Bro Code”. It’s my hope that, with a better understanding of the Code, Bros the world over can put aside their differences and strengthen the bonds of brotherhood. It is then, and only then, that we might work together as one to accomplish perhaps the most important challenge society faces – getting laid.
- Barney Stinson – The Bro Code –
THE BRO CODE – Article # 20
Bros Before Hoes. I know, I already used it. I can't stress it enough, though. It is absolutely infuriating how many of my guy friends have become insufferable ***** since they've gone out with someone.
ON THIS DAY
On this date in 1856, the very first Republican Party convention was held. Among those in attendance: Jebediah Palin, who said he could see the Civic War from his front yard.
In 1885, the Statue of Liberty arrived in New York City, along with a note that said, "Some assembly required"... in French, of course. While a gift from France, not many people know it came from IKEA and had to be assembled.
TODAY IS
Diane and Erin Murphy celebrate their 45th birthday today. They played "Tabitha," the daughter on the old "Bewitched" TV series. Yes, that scraping sound you're hearing is the bottom of the celebrity birthday barrel.
Joe Piscopo turns 58 today. He went from "Saturday Night Live" to Miller Lite commercials to "that guy who used to be on Saturday Night Live who did the Miller Lite commercials."
Newt Gingrich turns 66 today. In Congress, he was Speaker of the House. These days, he's only the speaker for his own house... and that's about it.
Barry Manilow also turns 66 today. He was born with the name Barry Allen Pincus... so I guess Barry Manilow is an upgrade.
THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW
CBS is filming a new reality show where they build an actual wall around 8 neighborhood homes and cameras capture the interaction between the trapped neighbors. The tentative title is "Block Party."
Pennsylvania State scientists have found two new species of bacteria which have been buried beneath two miles of ice in Greenland for at least 120,000 years... and revived them. So how is this a good idea?
Britain's Prince Andrew has angered environmentalists by buying a gas-guzzling luxury car -- a $330,000 Bentley Arnage.
Last Friday night NHL championship game was the most-watched NHL game in 36 years, pulling in 8 million viewers.
$410,000 worth of jewelry went missing after a London photo shoot and among those being question by police: the center of the photo shoot, Lindsay Lohan.
Susan Boyle's brother says that 95% of her fan mail comes from the U.S.
Congrats to Carnie Wilson and her husband, who welcomed their second daughter into the world together last Friday: a daughter, Luciana.
Dick Van Dyke is writing down his life story for a book to come out a year from this fall.
Ladies: 100 men voted on the looks they want to see you in (and out of). (from Redbook)
79% of men want a peek at your cleavage.
72% of men want to cuddle up with a cozy-sweater girl.
79% of men think a beachy sundress is hot.
64% of men would like to live with the girl next door.
67% of men are bewitched by bed-head.
60% of men go crazy for the snug fit of a pencil skirt.
Guys, what do you like to see a woman in (or out of)?
WEIRD NEWS -
But I Didn't Order Saliva on My Egg McMuffin! - In Berrien Springs, Michigan, a 32-year-old McDonald's employee is facing felony charges after he allegedly spit on a police officer's Egg McMuffin! Police say the guy was working the drive-thru window when an unidentified officer bit into his breakfast sandwich and immediately realized something was wrong. Reportedly, the restaurant's assistant manager noted the sandwich contained a "stringy with mucus" substance -- and no-- we don't mean McDonald's special sauce. The suspect, a parolee who spent 14 years in an Indiana prison, said he has nothing against police. In investigation is underway. (The Herald-Palladium)
Can I Cut In Line -- I'm Having a Baby! - In Columbus, Ohio, Dawn Thompson's graduation day from Columbus State University looked like it was going to be extra special. Dawn was sure she had gone into labor during last Friday's commencement exercises so she got moved up from No. 749 in the order for receiving degrees to first in line. As soon as she got her diploma she rushed off the stage with one hand clutching the document and the other on her swollen belly. A medic with a stretcher was waiting to take her to the hospital. But it turned out her pains were just a false alarm, and the hospital sent her home. But hey Dawn -- nice way to get moved up 749 spaces! (WEWS-TV News)
Flushed Puppy Miraculously Survived! - In Britain, a 1-week-old cocker spaniel narrowly escaped disaster after 4-year-old Daniel Blair decided to give him a bath in the toilet. Little Daniel said he tried to clean the muddy puppy but then accidentally flushed him down the toilet! His mother Alison thought the dog was dead, but a plumber located the poor pup in a sewage pipe 20 yards away from the house using a special drain camera. You'll be happy to know the dog is fine now. Well -- as fine as you can be after you've just been flushed down the toilet! (Ananova)
World's Toughest Owl! - If there was ever a World's Toughest Owl contest, the award would have to go to a great horned owl from the Minneapolis area. Back in 2007, a fish hook got stuck on her wing in a Burnsville lake but she was rescued, treated, and released. But just last week, she met a sports utility vehicle head on while flying down Highway 169 and got stuck in its grill. Dr. Julia Ponder works at the Raptor Center at the University of Minnesota, where the bird has been treated both times and said the owl hit hard enough that she cracked the plastic bumper. The bird, which apparently recently laid eggs, has broken her radius but she's expected to be released in the next month or so. (KARE-TV News)
Life 120,000 Years Old Found - Scientists from Pennsylvania State University have made an amazing discovery-- two new species of bacteria which have been buried beneath two miles of ice in Greenland for at least 120,000 years. Prof. Jennifer Loveland-Curtze led the discovery of the harmless bacteria, whose name we won't even begin to try to pronounce, and believes the bacteria survived because of its very small size. Both strains are 10 to 50 times smaller than the E. coli bacteria. And if you must attempt it, they are called: Herminiimonas glaciei and Chryseobacterium greenlandensis. (AHN News)
Hey Grandpa -- Let's Go To College Together! - Here's an amazing story. In Taiwan, a 96-year-old grandfather graduated from college on the same day as his 32-year-old grandson! Grandpa Chao Muhe, a retired teacher, got his master's degree in philosophy from the University of South China in southern Taiwan while his grandson, Zhao Shuangzhan, graduated from Chung Hua University. And although Grandpa Chao, as he became known around the campus, was more than 70 years older than his classmates, he says he did not feel out of place. But he said he often had to study until 2am or even 3am to keep up with the younger students. He added that he did it to set a good example for his grandson. (Ananova)
Sorry Ma'am. We'll Need To Check Your Pink Tattoo! - In Montreal, Sylvie Menard is furious after Canadian border agents made her strip to see if she had a pink tattoo on her buttocks after mixing her up with an alleged criminal. Menard, who has no history of trouble with the law, was flying home from a vacation in Mexico when the humiliating encounter with airport authorities went down. Dominique McNeely, a spokesman for the Canada Border Services Agency, said he could not discuss the case, but said false matches occur and such checks are necessary. Menard says it felt like a bad dream and was astounded when a female border officer asked her to expose her buttocks to see if she had a pink tattoo. The officer later made her disrobe again to check if one had been erased with a laser. She has lodged official complaints with the police watchdog and the border agency. (The Star)
TOP FIVE OTHER REASONS I'D WANT MEGAN FOX TO LIVE WITH ME
1. If we're ever REALLY invaded by Transformers, she'll know what to do
2. I want to use her to get to know Shia Lebeouf
3. I want to find out what her middle name is (OK, I already know it's Denise... shhhhh)
4. I'm sure she's a nice person. If not, oh well.
5. Doesn't spend a lot of money on clothes
HUNTER'S HUMOR by Tim Hunter
Italy has agreed to take three of the prisoners from Guantanamo Bay in exchange for a second round draft pick and a terrorist to be named later.
I can't help but thinking that somewhere, in David Letterman's dressing room, there's a bouquet of flowers from Conan O'Brien along with a note that says, "Thanks for the Palin joke!"
Not surprising, the Orlando Magic are now asking the federal government for a bailout.
Billy Ray Cyrus took his 16-year-old daughter Miley to have her nose pierced in Los Angeles last week. If it affects her singing, she plans to change her name to "Miley Sinus."
Iranian voters are upset about the results of their presidential election... this after their current president, George W. Ahmadinejad, was re-elected.
What irritated them most was the sign he put up after the election, "Mission: Accomplished."
GOIN' TO GET MARRIED
June, or Weddings Month, is here. "Although couples may think they're bucking tradition, they're actually collectively creating new wedding rules," says Christa Vagnozzi, senior editor of WeddingChannel.com. "Asking their best guy friend to be a man of honor, deciding to keep their last name and registering for their honeymoon are becoming more mainstream as brides and grooms strive to incorporate their personal style." Here are the four new wedding traditions for the 21st century:
Gender-Bending Rituals -- Man of honor? Best woman? Brides and grooms are no longer dismissing their best friends of the opposite sex when it comes to their wedding. In fact, according to a WeddingChannel.com poll, an 63% of brides said that if their best friend were a guy, they would definitely ask him to be a bridesman or man of honor.
A Friend as the Officiant -- According to a WeddingChannel.com poll, 59% of couples would be interested in having a friend or family member officiate.
The Name Game -- Don't make any assumptions when it comes to the bride's last name. According to the Real Weddings Survey 2007 by The Knot Wedding Network, 12% of brides don't plan on taking their spouse's name upon marriage.
Alternative Wedding Registries -- China and crystal are so yesterday. Brides and grooms are ditching traditional registries or augmenting them with such unusual gifts as horseback riding lessons, the honeymoon, a hi-definition plasma-screen TV and even donations to their favorite charity.
WHAT YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW REVEALS ABOUT YOU
(Sun) The TV shows you faithfully watch week after week actually boost your positive personality traits, experts say. "Studies indicate that the programs you enjoy most tend to give your ego a lift," says Indianapolis sociologist Denise Franks. "That's because the kinds of shows you choose reflect your virtues and attributes." See what your "must see TV" show reveals about you:
Cop shows like "Southland," "The Closer" or "In Plain Sight" - You're a "pragmatist" who enjoys figuring out "who done it." Logically arriving at a solution is a soothing exercise that relieves the stress of your busy day and leaves less time for worrying about your own problems. Your positive approach to most situations makes you the leader of the pack with both friends and family. You're the rock that others depend on to make important decisions and find the right path.
Sitcoms like "30 Rock," "Old Christine" and "My Name is Earl" - You're a "friend" who can always be depended upon. Your interest in others finds true meaning in your dedication to your community, working with other volunteers to improve your environment. Your sharp sense of humor and lively intelligence make you the life of the party, but you also use those two attributes to your advantage when an innovative answer is required to solve a crisis situation on the job.
Reality shows like "Survivor," "Project Runway" and "Hell's Kitchen" - You're a "romantic" who shines as a team player, doing whatever it takes to help your group win the day. You're a genius at collaborating because you inspire others to work just as hard as you to achieve your mutual goals. You thrive by being where the action is, meeting challenges face to face. You also have a strong competitive streak that propels you forward, without fear, into new adventures.
Dramas like "Grey's Anatomy," "Medium" and "Fringe" - You're "compassionate" with a rich imagination, easily putting yourself in someone else's shoes. Seeing all sides of a situation makes you a champ at handling problems with the diplomatic flair of a State Department veteran. You seldom judge other people. You'd rather reserve your opinion while giving others the benefit of the doubt. When the chips are down, you keep the faith that they won't let you down.
Cartoons like "Family Guy," "South Park" and "The Simpsons" - You're a creative "dynamo" who can identify with eccentric characters who are out of the mainstream. You're caring and sensitive to the needs of others with the ability to design excellent solutions for everyday dilemmas. Being a cartoon lover indicates you're receptive to new ideas and willing to try anything once. Your intuitive powers allow you to be in sync with the emotional atmosphere of charged situations.
Soaps like "The Young and The Restless," "All My Children" and "General Hospital" - You're a rebel who sets an agenda and shows little interest in the opinions of others. Even if you're stubborn about forging your own way, your devotion to friends and family is unsurpassed. Your independent attitude is often the catalyst for inspired ideas you develop while working alone. Once you've reached the pinnacle you were shooting for, you're more than happy to let others in on your secrets.
On to ROCK NEWS –
CHRISSIE HYNDE PROTESTS MINNESOTA ZOO GIG…The Pretenders' August 19th concert in Apple Valley, Minnesota has been moved from its original venue at the Weesner Amphitheater, after Chrissie Hynde protested playing the show which is housed in the Minnesota Zoo. Startribune.com reported that Hynde, an avid animal rights activist had written a letter to the zoo about its Family Farm exhibit, saying "How can a zoo invite children to touch and play with and express joy over animals for their uniqueness, only to turn around and sell those very animals to slaughter?" Hynde told zoo director Lee Ehmke that she planned to raise the question from the stage the night of the show
According to a representative of PETA, the zoo canceled the show. Kelly Lessard, a spokesperson for the zoo added, "Goats, sheep, calves and pigs from the Family Farm exhibit are sold at livestock auctions at the end of each summer season, just as they would be on a regular farm. . . . We've never hidden our mission."
Hynde says she is dedicated to PETA's cause, and that she will use her fame to help the organization in any way it sees fit: "You know, I'm always available to PETA, including posthumously. I've agreed that they can use my image in any way at all after I die to promote the cause, so..."
The Pretenders kick off their North American dates on August 4th and 5th in Rama, Ontario at Casino Rama Entertainment Centre.
YOKO ONO JOINS PAUL McCARTNEY AND KIDS TO LAUNCH 'MEAT FREE MONDAYS'…Yoko Ono joined Paul McCartney and his kids on Monday (June 15th) in London's St. James Park to publicize "Meat Free Monday." Britain's Coventry Telegraph reported that Ono, McCartney, and his children with late wife Linda McCartney -- Mary, Stella, and James -- were publicizing the campaign "to reduce greenhouse gas emissions from the world's livestock population, thought to be a major cause of global warming."
McCartney explained, "I thought this was a great idea. To just reduce your meat intake maybe by one day a week and this would seriously benefit the planet. My family have been this way for years -- vegetarians, that is."
Among the other notables on hand to support Ono and the McCartneys were Kate Bosworth, Kelly Osbourne, and Moby.
RELEASE DATE SET FOR 9TH PEARL JAM STUDIO ALBUM…Pearl Jam has tentatively set September 22nd as the release date for the band's ninth studio album, titled Backspacer. The CD is the band's first since leaving Sony Music and will be released at least initially as a Target exclusive, with other retail partnerships in the works.
KRIST NOVOSELIC ABANDONS COUNTY CLERK RUN…Ex-Nirvana bassist Krist Novoselic has abandoned his short-lived campaign to become county clerk of Wahkiakum County in Washington State. Novoselic said he staged the campaign to protest a new state law that allows candidates to affiliate themselves with a political party or local organization whether the party or organization endorses them or not. Novoselic ran under the banner of the Grange Party, a fictitious party based on a real farming group. He wrote, "I'm just trying to make a point. And I think I made it crystal clear: It's wrong for me to drag a private association unwittingly onto the public ballot. There, said it, done, no need to drag this on toward the November election."
METALLICA PLANNING OCTOBER SURPRISE?...Metallica announced in an email blast to its mailing list on Tuesday (June 16th) that the band is rescheduling a concert in Ottawa, Canada, originally scheduled for October 29th, to November 3rd. The reason? According to the email, "the date change is due to a scheduling conflict with a very cool event coming up around that time. We wanted to let you know about the new date in Ottawa ASAP, but we've been sworn to secrecy on all other fronts . . . more details in mid to late July."
No other information was available, and a rep for Metallica also did not have any comment.
All tickets for the Ottawa date are good on the 3rd, and anyone who cannot make the new show is entitled to a refund at their point of purchase.
Everyone attending the rescheduled gig will also receive a voucher for a free download of that night's show at livemetallica.com.
Metallica will start a North American tour on September 14th in Nashville as the band continues supporting 2008's Death Magnetic album.
EDDIE VAN HALEN SUES NIKE…Eddie Van Halen has filed a lawsuit against the Nike shoe company, according to Los Angeles station KTLA-TV. The Van Halen guitarist filed his claim on Friday (June 12th), alleging that Nike used the trademarked striped design from his guitar for its new line of "Dunk Lows" tennis shoes. According to the suit, Van Halen copyrighted a red, white and black streaked design for his "Frankenstein" guitar in 2001, the same design he claims Nike has used for the midsole of its new shoes.
Van Halen's suit alleges that Nike infringed on his copyright and used the design without "consent, approval or license."
The guitarist claims that Nike is doing "irreparable harm and damage" to his design. In addition to damages, he is seeking all profits from the sales of "Dunk Lows" and a permanent injunction halting production of the Nike shoes.
Van Halen also recently launched his own line of striped sneakers.
That’s it for now, as always, if you can’t be good, be good at it and don’t get caught!!
Jonathan
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